Positivity > Science?

Today’s appointment wasn’t great.  There are still several follicles, but not all of them are growing at the same speed and they aren’t confident that three of them will even be mature. So, they pretty much left it up to us as to if we want to proceed to retrieval. This cycle, I’ve spent more on medicine than on retrieval, so we’re pushing forward.  Though everyone will do their best, it was apparent that this isn’t ideal.  We briefly talked about tweaks for the next cycle and we’re kind of at a standstill, which really fucking sucks.  There aren’t really any more tweaks that are drastic that we can do, so, donor eggs would be the “next step.”

The endometriosis just keeps getting worse and going in for additional surgery would likely just damage my ovaries. As they told me, there’s nothing I could’ve done to prevent  the endo from occurring, but it is “the devil.”

Stranger things have happened, though. I trigger tonight and egg retrieval will be Tuesday AM. If any of you can will this into existence, I’d be thankful. I am not ready to give up on a J/Annie biological baby and it’s looking more and more like I might have to.

My blood test will determine if we should try to do a fresh transfer if we get bebe embryos or if I will need to do a frozen transfer later.  I hope with all my heart I’ve got some strong, mature eggs getting ready to surprise us.

We will see.