Noxzema, Stridex, and [in]fertility medication: an ode to side effects

If you choose to subscribe to Webster’s definition, a side effect is a secondary, typically undesired result of a drug or treatment. For those of you who would like to take a more optimistic view with me, I believe side effects are indications that the treatment is “working.”

Throughout my teenage years, I would never believe my skin was improving unless whatever I was immersing it in was slightly painful. That’s how you knew it was working! Face wash, mouth wash, tweezing, waxing, the list goes on… things that may be unpleasant can yield results!

So, Day 22. Either the side effects of the drugs or things that are new which I’m attributing to the drugs include:

• Oil & Adult acne. My face is like a pepperoni pizza with a side of additional oil. The oil is slowly transfusing throughout my body, from my scalp through my face and all my skin. Somehow, my hair is like an oil rig but also extremely dry. It’s quite the phenomenon. I stopped getting my hair highlighted again to save $$, but now all the oils collect in the dark places (aka the roots) having the dual result of calling attention to the oil and having my hair appear darker. For someone who quite prefers being blonde (judge me if you want, I realize it’s only hair), this is slightly unsettling. It also allows me to see the white hairs slowly permeating my head.
• Dreams (mostly unpleasant) x 1000. Since the dreams seem expressly related to the events in my life, my brother made the point that I should start trying to direct them by reading or listening to something poignant prior to bed. Most of the time, my dreams involve people, ideas, or events surrounding work, but as soon as I made it to KC, they translated to dreams of friends and family. I’ll be trying to manufacture them this evening, perhaps they will be a little more pleasant.
• Joint/Muscle pain- I keep telling J that someone is taking my body to Crossfit during my slumbers. Side note: that would be amazing if that were a thing.
• Sweating. I’ve never been a sweater. I normally don’t have to wear deodorant because I don’t sweat very often, thus don’t smell. Something that seems to be a common theme with all of these drugs is the sweat. Most of the time, I smell like a teenage boy who forgot deodorant and ran a cross country race.

I try to leave out any that the public may not want to read, but there are some less savory side effects, as well.

So, what does all this mean!?! It must mean it’s working.

Doctor’s appointment Monday morning for a look inside. I pick up new meds and more needles for the old! Fingers crossed that everything looks amazing.