Marginally better than Applebee’s

So, my mom did all the cooking in our family until I was about 9. At that point, my dad took over. My dad, much like myself, likes feedback and encouragement on his endeavors. A running joke in our family is something my dad said after every meal: “well, it was marginally better than Applebee’s.” It’s something I now say to my husband and those who eat with us. I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who gets amusement from it, but since it tickles me so, I continue saying it.

When I got to the doctor’s office today, it was 11:45 AM and they were ordering lunch. It sounded delicious, so I asked them from where they were ordering. Of course, the answer was Applebee’s. It’s a fairly small office so when you’re there three times weekly, you learn the people fairly quickly. Anyway, they got their Applebee’s while I waited.

It was the longest wait I’ve had thus far, but still seemed like nothing as compared to traditional doctors. I waited about 10 minutes before they called me back. Ordinarily, I have blood taken first, then go for the ultrasound. This time, they told me I would get blood work, if necessary, after the ultrasound. So, I deskirted, got on the table and waited. 

Shortly after my disrobing, both the doctor and nurse came in to take a look around (kinda sounds like they’re window shopping, rather than probing my vagina, but whatever). I feel like I’m fairly good at sensing energy and immediately knew that it wasn’t positive. They always have to push on my lower belly to get a good view of my left ovary since my uterus is so twisted which is an added intrusion. Since my right ovary is less evasive, they tend to check that out first. There appeared to be a couple of follicles, none were large. Then, while looking at my left ovary, we discussed that it is fairly covered in scar tissue.  After they were satisfied with the results, I sat up to talk.

They explained that they will not proceed this month because it’s just not enough and there is so little chance of even getting a viable embryo. We also discussed the fact that my left ovary might not do anything due to the amount of endometriosis still present. It’s incredibly hard to hear, regardless of how much I tried to prepare myself. To their credit, they seem very used to crying pantless women and have a steady stream of Kleenex on tap. After that, the doctor recommended that I go ahead and induce ovulation with an injection of HCG this evening since it’s only $120 and “miracles happen.” So, we will try it the “natural” (or as natural as it can get when I’ve been on injectible medication for 10 days) way this month.

After wiping my tears, sucking it up, and getting dressed, I went out to discuss next steps. They informed me that they started me on a medium dosage of drugs due to the endo, but there’s still plenty to go. So, I’m out the $$ for the medication, but the rest of the money we spent is still “banked” for the time when I’m actually able to proceed. I will be on double the meds this next cycle (hopefully not double the $, but I assume it will be) and we will go from there. A hard day, for sure. 

I’m thankful today for my friends, family, health, and job.

Cheers & love! 

💕💕💕